Friday, March 30, 2007

Those chocolatey nads

It had to happen. The 6-foot, 200-lb, anatomically-correct chocolate jesus that I posted about back here has enraged religious wingnut Bill Donohue and the Catholic League. Upon hearing about the choco-messiah, Donohue fired off an angry press release entitled (and I am not making this up): "NAKED JESUS - GENITALS EXPOSED - CRUCIFIED":


“As I’ve said many times before, Lent is the season for non-believers to sow seeds of doubt about Jesus. What’s scheduled to go on at the Roger Smith Hotel, however, is of a different genre: this is hate speech. And choosing Holy Week—the display opens on Palm Sunday and ends on Holy Saturday—makes it a direct in-your-face assault on Christians."


"Hate speech". What a fucking idiot. A chocolate jesus can't be hate speech: everyone loves chocolate. I can see the fundies being upset by a dog shit jesus, but chocolate? No way.


Of course, the chocolate isn't really what this is all about -- it's the exposed genitals that have Donohue in a spastic, spittle-flying, masturbatory rage. I guess it doesn't help that the artist is inviting people to eat chocolate jesus at midnight on April 1, which would almost certainly mean someone getting to eat his chocolate weenie. That of course prompted another hysterical press release from Donohue, which ends with the dire warning:


“The Roger Smith Hotel will rue the day it sought to declare war on Christian sensibilities.”

The hotel doesn't give a shit; they're ignoring Donohue and going on with the midnight chocolate jesus-tasting. It's kind of frightening that these religious wingnuts are so sexually-obsessed, repressed and guilty that they can't even get a smile out of the concept of a chocolate jesus, his body symbolically broken and eaten just like in the bible. They can only obsess about his exposed chocolate genitals.

UPDATE: Donohue - 1, Chocolate Jesus - 0. The exhibit's cancelled. (Thanks to Great Aunty Bertha for the update.)