Wednesday, September 19, 2007


Avast, mateys it's that time of yeaaaaar again, "Talk Like A Pirate Day".

Last Talk Like A Pirate Day, I was worryin' about those mangy curs in the Bush Administarrrrration an' the havoc they been wreakin' in Arrrrrraq, which they're callin' "the Warrrrrr on Tarrrrrror". Well, they're still a-plunderin' an' a-pillagin' at home and abarrrrroad -- them lily-livered bilge-suckin' swine the Democarrrrrats took control o' the ship but forgot t'keelhaul the scurvy whoreson bilge rats and they got away. Arrrr, there might even be another warrrrrr comin' up if them scum-ridden weevil-shaggers get tharrrr way, this time with Arrrrrran! Them thievin' scurvy scum just go from one country to the next, lootin' an' pillagin' an' plunderrrrin', it never ends, me hearrrrties. Not 'til they be walkin' the plank! Yarrrrrrr!

So what kind o' pirate are ye?

You are The Quartermaster

You, me hearty, are a man or woman of action! And what action it is! Gruesome, awful, delightful action. You mete out punishment to friend and foe alike – well, mostly to foe, because your burning inner rage isn’t likely to draw you a whole lot of the former. Still, though you may be what today is called “high maintenance” and in the past was called “bat-shit crazy,” the crew likes to have you around because in a pinch your maniacal combat prowess may be the only thing that saves them from Jack Ketch. When not in a pinch, the rest of the crew will goad you into berserker mode because it’s just kind of fun to watch. So you provide a double service – doling out discipline AND entertainment.