I've never seen Charles McVety talk for more than a few snack-sized sound bites, so last night I watched his show, which runs on the Miracle Channel, online. OUCH. My unrelentingly logical mind tends to start screaming in agony when exposed to more than a few minutes of incoherent non-sequiturs and straw men, so 20 minutes of raw, unleashed and unchained McVety was kind of a shock to the system. I may have to call in sick today.
This week, McVety treated his viewers to a rambling, repetitive and factually-inaccurate diatribe against the she-devil, Chief Justice Beverley McLachlin. He opened with something about "42 groups filing a complaint" (inaccurate fact #1) and went on to list 7 ways McLachlin had contravened Chuckles' Rules of Order. McLachlin, it seems, is a threat not only to democracy, but to the very fabric and foundation of Our Society, the rule of law, the family, marriage and everything else, because according to McVety she "rode roughshod" over the Order of Canada constitution. McVety got more "uh uh umm" exercised the longer he spoke, at one point sounding like he was shitting his pants ("Uh! Huh! Uhh! UHHH!!!"). And maybe he was: I would be too, if I'd been caught ASTROTURFING.
McVety was particularly incensed that in the past, McLachlin advised judges to have "active imaginations". "Active imaginations" -- what kind of thing is that for our judges to have??" thundered McVety. Those active imaginations were apparently responsible for "re-defining marriage" and causing the sky to come crashing down upon us. McVety rode roughshod over Justice Roy McMurtry, who was instrumental in making equal marriage the law in Ontario. After which all the provinces fell, one by one, like rainbow-coloured dominoes... SHRIEEEK!
McVety's 20-minute tirade was naturally punctuated with feverish pleas for cash -- "Get involved! Get a degree from Canada Christian College! Call us tonight! Our operators are standing by!" -- as the words "MASTERCARD or VISA available!" scrolled along the bottom of the screen. These unrelenting hucksters always have an eye on the Main Chance.
"Call us tonight"? Well, I tried.
Unfortunately, operators were not standing by -- either that or the Jesus Camp Phone Police already have my number flagged as that of a godless miscreant and worse, a cheapskate. By divine intervention, my call was greeted with a continuous busy signal, and being one of the amoral "leftists" who demands instant gratification, I hung up. Maybe that's how they weed us out. Oh well, I'm pretty sure Chuckles wouldn't have wanted to answer my questions about Astroturfing anyway... even if he'd really been available to speak to, which he wasn't, this show having been pre-recorded. Chiselers!
The video, should you be so inclined, is up at word.ca... it really must be seen to be believed.