Saturday, October 13, 2007

Big week for "scare quotes"

Time for my weekly tour of Lifesite, that fount of ecumenical wisdom, old wives' tales and fake "studies". Great snappin' assholes, they're burning up the " key this week! There was just so much persecution and subversive anti-religious secular-humanist sin to be outraged about! Check it out:

That "pro-abortion" bastard "Al Gore" won the "Nobel Peace Prize" for his "work" on "climate change", which is all "junk science". How do they know it's junk science? Because it relies on mathematical computer models, which don't work...
"These computer models and their output are passionately defended by the modeling clique and frequently derided by empiricists -- but the bottom line is that models make an enormous range of assumptions. Whether all the assumptions, tweaks and parameter adjustments really collectively add up to a realistic representation of the atmosphere is open to some conjecture (current climate models do not model "natural" climatic variation very well), but there is no evidence yet that they can predict the future with any greater certainty than a pack of Tarot cards."

oh waitwaitwait except when it comes to studies about abortion and breast cancer!
Then they're great!!!
"Carroll used the same mathematical model for a previous forecast of numbers of breast cancers in future years for England & Wales based on cancer data up to 1997 that has proved quite accurate for predicting cancers observed in years 1998 to 2004."
I mean "great"!!!

Also causing apoplectic outrage and overuse of the " key is a San Francisco archbishop (and I'm surprised they didn't put "archbishop" in quotes) who apologized for having given communion to a couple of guys from the Folsom Fair... but Lifesite isn't having any of it. They infer with a sinister tone that the archbishop has a History Of "Mistakes" related to homosexuality. Unlike the Catholic church, which has a history of mistakes related to pedophelia. Why does lifesite hate the children?

A Mexican priest gets hit with a few " " "s, for trying to follow the teachings of Jesus and save womens' lives by fighting for legalized abortion. Lifesite doesn't even believe he's a real priest, just another pro-abort insurgent in the war against religiously-sanctioned misogyny. Which is even better, in my view.

Those bastards at UNICEF, yeah that's right, the organization that helps starving children, are doing their evil thang once again, participating in a conference that features pro-choice advocates and Catholics for Choice. Catholics for Choice scores a couple of these " " because of that "for choice" thing. Bad Unicef: don't let your kids take those little boxes with them this Hallowe'en!!! Every time someone puts a penny in, a fetus loses its wings.

And "WOW"! Glad this is all out in the open now... Lifesite thinks Ann Coulter was right on the money with her anti-semitic remarks about those "imperfect" Jooooos! What's next, I wonder -- Holocaust denial? No more hiding behind those "I Support Israel" banners, you Christian blogging soldiers. The pinch is in in IN!

And "that's it" for my "weekly tour" of the "Site" of "Life". Tune in next week when I examine Lifesite's use of ' because the " key is worn out.